I haven't blogged in quite a while. I've had a lot going on. Let me catch you up.
On October 1st I was admitted to the hospital to have my gallbladder removed after about four days of very severe pain. I had the surgery on October 2nd and was sent home the same day even though my pain was still very severe. I went back to into the hospital on October 5th because I had a bile duct leak from the gallbladder surgery. I had a procedure called an ERCP on October 6th to place a stent in my stomach so that the bile could drain. This was supposed to take care of the pain that I was in. It didn't. I woke up from the procedure in even more pain. I was sent home hours after the procedure even though I was in horrible pain and had a fever.
The next night, my husband drove me up to another hospital's ER with a very high fever and pain. I was admitted after a CT scan that showed what the ER doctor thought was a Crohn's flare. Thankfully it wasn't Crohn's. It was a post-op infection. I was treated for the infection by a really good group of doctors at that hospital and was sent home. I was still in pain, but it wasn't as bad.
After five weeks I was still in pain. It had actually gotten so severe that we went back to the ER but they couldn't figure out what was causing the pain to be so much worse. My new doctor did another ERCP on November 10th and removed the stent that had been placed. He also cleaned out sludge that was left around the stent and cut a muscle in my stomach that had been contracting and causing that really severe pain. I woke up in significantly less pain but I was kept overnight at the hospital anyway.
Since then I have been slowly getting better. My pain is minimal now, but I am still having a lot of problems eating. I'm having a CT scan next week to check my small intestines for any sign of active Crohn's disease. If it isn't Crohn's it is probably just my stomach getting use to not having a gallbladder anymore. I've lost 15 pounds since this whole nightmare started.
I'm finally able to work again, drive again and sit up for more than 30 minutes without wanting to cry in pain. I should be happy that I am so much better now, and I am. But I'm mad. I was supposed to have my first round of IVF in November. I very well could have been pregnant right now. Now we have a deductible to pay and no clue of when I'm going to be healthy enough or when we are going to have the money to proceed with treatment. I'm so mad. This didn't have to happen. If the first surgery had been done carefully I would probably be fine right now. I'm the kind of mad that makes me want to punch things and smash glass things to pieces.
I try to keep it together during the day but I have times that I just break out in tears from anger at all of this. November marked our second year of trying to get pregnant and now I'm going to spend another Christmas with no hope in sight of being a mom.
I'm tired and angry. I hate infertility. I hate the guy who removed my gallbladder. I want to smash things.
That is all I've got for today.
